Back in May, I posted about being back, then went silent again. My life has been pretty upside-down for a while, and I am not very good at dealing with it at times. This blog went by the wayside.
I am back at college, full time, and have a little job on the side, plus my little
Etsy shop is actually generating sales every week or so, so I think I should climb back in to the blogging saddle and see if I can do you, if there are any of you left, right.
Today, I got to class early and so I picked a spread from the many I have pinned on
Pinterest.com, and did a quick layout. I did not take a photo, so you'll have to use your imaginations.
Here's the layout I used, which is to be credited to
Labyrinthos Academy, which is an online tarot school, apparently. They have some great spreads, and I pin their stuff all of the time, so you'll probably see them again.
So let's get to the breakdown:
The card position meanings:
1) your role in the relationship
2) your partner's role in the relationship
3) past foundation
4) current state
5) looming future
I dealt for myself:
1) The Queen of Questing (Wands,) Reversed. Fire/Idea
2) The Ace of Dynamism (Swords) Air/Action
3) The Page of Primordialism (Cups,) Reversed. Water/Emotion
4) The Five of Questing (Wands) Fire/Idea
5) The Queen of Primordialism (Cups) Water/Emotion
The keyword associations for each card:
1) Opposition, Jealousy, Chastity, Enterprise
2) Knowledge, Conquest, Victory, Clarity, Inventiveness, Originality
3) Deception, Obstacle, Inaction
4) Strife, Competition, Obstacles, Anxiety, Frustration, Freneticism, Hyperactivity
5) Imagination, Emotional Integrity, Self-Reflection, Unconscious, New Form, New Identity, New Life, Expressing Oneself Without Blame or Judgement
So now let's try to tell a story with what I was dealt. You might notice I've started to put the element and anther descriptor alongside the cards - I often point these out as I perform readings, so I thought I'd note them here.
So, for the the first position, 'your role in the relationship,' I drew the Queen of Wands in Reverse, whose keywords are Opposition, Jealousy, Chastity, and Enterprise. Remember, not every keyword association relates to every reading, so I'll discard the ones that either make no sense or are obviously contradictory to my actual current role in my relationship. I remove Chastity and Enterprise (although Enterprise may hold some bearing here, its slim, and is more of a descriptor than anything else, and I know the reading is about me, so out it goes!) and that leaves me with Opposition and Jealousy. These words are very appropriate for my current role and situation. Wands are the house of Ideas and Fire, and these also really apply here, for personal reasons I don't need to lay out in this blog.
In the second position, 'your partner's role in the relationship,' i drew the Ace of Swords, whose keywords are Knowledge, Conquest, Victory, Clarity, Inventiveness, and Originality. I'm going to toss out Knowledge, Inventiveness, and Originality, leaving me with Conquest, Victory, and Clarity. I'm biased, but due to recent events and upheavals in our life, I feel that my partner certainly feels as if he has won, (Conquest, Victory,) and he has Clarity of thought (although I see it more as tunnel vision atm.) Swords are the House of Air and Action, and I have been feeling lately that he is in the power position, and that he has the next move.
In the third position, 'past foundation,' I drew the Page of Cups, in Reverse, whose keywords are Deception, Obstacle, and Inaction. Looking at our past together, which spans nearly 13 years, I see how these keywords apply. Cups is the house of Water and Emotion, and we certainly have a long, emotion filled history, and there's been a fair share of Deception, whether it be intentional or us deceiving ourselves at times, we have had many Obstacles, more than sometimes I thought we could bear, and as for Inaction, well, we both are procrastinators and are usually reluctant to make important decisions or act upon them.
In the fourth position, 'current state,' I drew the Five of Wands, whose keywords are Strife, Competition, Obstacles, Anxiety, Frustration, Freneticism, and Hyperactivity. This card really describes things a lot, for me at least, and my view of the current state of my relationship. There is absolutely Competition, more Obstacles than I 'd like to face, I have major Anxiety about it, I'm Frustrated,
he's frustrated....I'll kick out the Freneticism and Hyperactivity, as they don't really apply here so much, unless they refer to my thinking about stuff too much, paired with the Anxiety. The Wands again are the house of Fire and Ideas, and our current state is Firey and full of us and our opposing Ideas about our situation.
In the fifth and final position, 'looming future,' I drew the Queen of Cups. It is a relief to draw a card from the house of love, passion, and emotion for my 'looming future,' but let's analyse: Imagination, Emotional Integrity, Self-Reflection, Unconscious, New Form, New Identity, New Life, and Expressing Oneself Without Blame or Judgement. Each of these keyword associations can be taken in a really positive way, and even cumulatively they can be as well. It would be nice to assume the best and see only sunshine and roses, but lets look a little harder. Three of the keywords can be taken a couple of different ways: New Form, New Identity, New Life. On one hand, we can read this as renewal and rebirth of the relationship itself, but o the other hand it could be implying that each person may be seeking those things alone. If I wanted to , I could say that the keywords say that with Imagination, Emotional Integrity and Self Reflection, WE will find a New Form and Identity for our relationship, build a New, better Life, and find ways to Express Ourselves without Blame or Judgement from the other. OR, I could read it in a way that tells me I will be setting out on my own journey to find a new form, identity, and life.
Scary stuff. I am choosing to let the cards tell me to move forward with Imagination and Emotional Integrity, do some Self-Reflection, and create a New Form for my relationship along with a new Identity and Life (something I'm already trying to do by taking the reins of my life, instead of letting them dangle by the cartwheels of the chariot.)
I am choosing that because I am terrified of the alternative. This is a perfect example of using personal bias to drive our readings in one direction or another. This is why I typically don't so readings for myself, as well.
Normally, when I break down a reading here, it's a 'blind reading,' which means I just threw down cards with no intent, just to get something to work with to show you guys a layout. Unless I say so, these breakdowns will always be blind.
